I guess I’ll start off saying Happy Birthday to me. Today marks my 26th year on this planet Tori made a journal entry wishing me a happy birthday, it was so sweet. I just get tickled when I see it. My birthdays haven’t been really that special to me in the past. They just feel like another day ya know? Although today I feel special. Tori makes me feel special and I gave myself a wonderful present. My little sister called me at lunch time to wish me a happy birthday, and her friend jumped on the phone too. It was nice to hear from her since we don’t talk all that much but she’s not a phone talker to begin with. So Happy Birthday to me.

One of my co-workers took me out for lunch. This proved to be interesting because I was planning on going down to the County Courthouse and file my name change. I been filling out the form at work and a few want to know what it is for. I just tell them its for “something”. It’s driving them nuts lol. So anyway, we drive downtown. Now, I have never been in the heart of downtown Tampa and it was really nice. It reminded me of the city life I like Although they moved the courthouse because the one I was told to go was under-construction. We walked around looking for an alternate enterance but never found one. On the backside across the street I saw “13th Judicial Circuit Court” on a building and I was like, maybe I gotta go there since that was the website I went to for the forms.

It’s a brand new building, it was really beautiful in exterior architecture and interior was nice. The line wasn’t too long for Family Court filings but I still stood there for a good bit. My co-worker that went with me just walked around looking at stuff so he wasn’t around when I got to the teller window and stated my business for being there. I turned my paper work in and was informed that I needed finger prints as well. I was like WTF, I was never told this on the phone when I called. So anyway, she was like, you can still file the application but just bring us a set of your finger prints. I paid the cashier and was on my way.

My co-worker took off though because he didn’t want a parking ticket so he had to fend off the meter maids lol. So I figure on Monday, I’ll drive downtown to the Police department, get finger printed and run them over to the courthouse. It cost me $267.00 to file the change of name in Hillsborough County. $255.00 for the name change fee and $12.00 for sealing the change of name to the Office of Vital Statistics and the Florida Department of Law Enforcement. I’ll be contacted by mail of a court date after the “Case Management Unit” reviews my file. So far, step 1 complete… Yay!

We then headed for lunch. My little sister called during this time. We went to this mom and pop pizza shop near the SOHO District. It was called Sally’s Pizza Hotline. It’s gourmet pizza and it was the first time either of us had been there. I heard about this place from another co-worker. We had “The Sauceless Pizza”, dough brushed with garlic and oil, extra cheese, pepperoni, sausage, herbs and a dash of herbs. It was so good! It was sweet of him to pick up the tab. By the time we got back to work, 2.5 hours had passed! Kinda long lunch break

I waited till today to file the change of name because I needed to wait for my parents to get back from their trip to Canada. My parents had some info I needed to complete the name change. They arrived back on Wednesday. They drove up to Thunder Bay for a couple weeks because it was my Grandpa’s birthday. I don’t remember how old he is. At any rate because my brother is getting married next summer, they had to tell relatives about my transition. My mom was only planning on telling her sister but she ended up telling everyone since nearly everyone was in town for the birthday! So, all my aunts, uncles and cousins know that I am transgendered and that I am transitioning. Pretty much, my parents said the initial reaction from everyone was good. Nobody had anything negative to comment on and even some expressed concern about how hard it is for me and wanted to know how I am doing. My mom still didn’t tell her mom, my Grandma, because she thinks it will literally kill her. Her sister agrees and to some extent, I think it’s possible.

My Mom’s Mom is 80+, does not speak english, has never driven a car, she is really old school. She is from Finland, as is my mom. I can understand a lot of Finnish when they speak still but I cannot speak it back. It’s tough trying to talk to my Grandma because of it. I am also her favorite. I was the first born from her two daughters and she gave me her wedding band a couple years ago. She told my Mom that she wants to see me get married before she dies. She’s gonna have to know by next summer if she’s coming to the wedding so my Mom is trying to figure out how to go about doing this. It’s great though that for the most part, I have support from all my relatives but it’ll be interesting to see what happens next summer.

Speaking of my brother’s wedding, I feel bad about not being his best man. Not that I want to be a “Best Man” because by then I am gonna be living fulltime going on 6-7 months and I just am not reverting back for special occassions. I just feel bad that he wanted me as his and now he can’t. It upsets me. He asked a friend to be his best man instead, which doesn’t bother me, but his friend wanted to know why he didn’t want me. Well my brother told him about me being a transsexual. His friend was pretty amazed. He was floored, I guess he just had no clue and couldn’t see why. At any rate, I’m not gonna be in the wedding in any capacity. I’m OK with that though, I’m happy that my brother and his now, fiancee are getting married. My brother and sisters are going to be back home for wedding stuff. They have to get fitted for Brides dresses and I guess a tux for my brother. I didn’t even know about this until my older sister told me when I talked to her last week. My mom told me Wednesday. I wish I could be home this weekend, to see everyone and to be back home for my birthday since it’s not going to be eventful being down here.

Well, at least it’s my birthday and I made another step in my transition. To those who are curious what I am changing my name to, I am keeping the first name “Erin” and using my mother’s first name for my middle name, which is “Liisa” and yes there are two “i’s” in her name, it’s not a mistake, it’s Finnish and I’ll be keeping my current last name. So my initials will be ELN. I’ll be the fourth in the family with an LN in the intials. My two sisters initials are BLN and KLN, and my dad is BLN. My Mom is LON and brother is BSN. I’m still gonna go by “Erin James” on the internet though.

Have a great weekend y’all.